Wow…it’s been a long, long time…. March 21, 2009

almost 6 weeks since my last update. Have no fear, I will be updating a LOT in the near future. Bedrest is approaching fast and furiously.

To update – the baby seems to be a-okay. I had a second part of the ultrascreen done and the results dropped to 1 in 40. Which was great news for me and made me start thinking about skipping the amnio. Then I went for a growth sono last week and there are no significant markers, so I opted out of the amnio. And the Drs. didn’t give me a hard time – which makes me even happier!

The baby looks great, confirmed that it is a boy. At the growth sono, the tech tried to do a Level II but had some issues seeing the stomach bladder. So, I go back on April 1st  for my true Level II and hopefully his little stomach will be full then. And they will see it, and all will be well.

My new job is working out really well. I am catching on and don’t have too many concerns regarding my ability to do this after I go back. I am actually enjoying it – I love the commute more than anything. From 90 minutes to 5 minutes – how do you beat that? We have decided on what we are going to do with the room and I’m thinking about painting the ceiling fan blades to match the bedding. I’m probably crazy, but what else am I going to do with my time, right?

And, my mom is back in the hospital. I’ve been trying to go up as much as possible, but at the same time don’t want to overdo it for myself. She is severely malnourished and they were afraid she was going to just die of malnourishment if they didn’t address it. So, they attached a feeding port last night and will start feeding her through it on Sunday. There have been a few complications – but that’s par for the course in our family….

She does look much better than she has in eons, so there’s something to that. I feel bad cuz she is hungry (they have her on a completely liquid diet), but she hasn’t vomitted in a week. This is a first for her in over a year, so I’m certainly not bringing her any food…..

Last but not least, the anniversary of Rogan’s birth/death is tomorrow. The fact that I have this new baby growing inside of me makes it a lot easier to deal with, but at the same time I’m feeling a lot of guilt for not being as sad as I think I should be. I don’t know what the right answer is….and I probably won’t really until tomorrow…but we are going to go to Church and say a prayer for our little Angel and hope that he continues to watch over his baby brother and then we will go to the cemetery and bring him some flowers, along with his little bear that I’ve been holding over the winter.

Peace…..

Happy Valentines Day February 14, 2009

Hallmark holiday that it is, I still get a little mushy about it!

My updates are as follows:

Last official day at my job of 23 years was yesterday. I start a new job on Tuesday….scary yet exciting!! I’ll still be working the  old place on the weekends until I go on bedrest, but no more weekday working….I’m very excited about the new job, just worried that my preggo brain is going to have a hard time absorbing all this new info.

Went to the OB yesterday for my followup on the cerclage. Everything looks good. Heard the creatures heartbeat again, talked about the amnio (I’m going to wait until I go on bedrest to do it since I don’t want to terminate anyway). Talked about cord blood banking, oddly my OB doesn’t think it’s the greatest idea – or maybe that’s because I told her we wouldn’t have the money for it anyway. Not with me being out of work for 6 months. Talked about the risk of Down’s and she said not to worry too much, that even with odds of 1 in 7 it’s still pretty good that the baby won’t have DS. And that was about it.

Got a flat tire on Thursday night, so I had to leave the OB and go get a new tire for the truck….thankfully, the new job is only five minutes away so I won’t be having as much car issues as I usually do.

And lastly….a Valentines Pic from Misty-Moo!!!!

I have been terrible about this and I’m sorry February 6, 2009

I have to apologize about my lack of attention to this blog. I have had an extremely hectic few weeks and haven’t been updating so this is going to be a massive all-in-one.

Will start with the most recent first: Cerclage was done this past Tuesday (2/3) and went very well. They did a spinal anesthetic as opposed to general anesthesia in order to protect the baby. So, I was completely aware during the whole procedure although I stopped watching after I saw the size of the speculum they were using. It took about a half hour for the Dr. to do the stitch and then it took about another hour for the spinal to wear off. Very weird feeling the old spinal tap…no movement or feeling whatsoever in my legs and feet. When my hubby came into the recovery room he was tickling my feet and I felt absolutely nothing. Once I was able to stand alone and go to the bathroom, they were ready to release me. I had my first wheelchair ride out of a hospital. Hubby took me to my mother’s where my mom and sisters are around to make sure I don’t get out of bed and they’ve done a good job of that. Today was the first day they actually let me sort of walk around a bit and even then they start yelling if they feel I’m up for too long.

Backtrack – Now I’m going all the way back and moving forward — Went for the Ultrascreen ten days ago and they couldn’t get good measurements on the babies nuchal translucency, when they finally did get some decent measurements they combined the good ones with the bad and came up with a number of 2.7 (it’s supposed to be less than 2.5) so my results came back with a 1 in 7 chance of having Down’s Syndrome. I’m so worried about this now. Of course, before the cerclage I was trying to focus on the cerclage first and foremost. Now that that’s done, I’m worried about this baby having Down’s. You would think after all we’ve been through we could get through this without any issues. And the more stories I hear about people finding out the babies didn’t have Down’s actually scare me even more cuz what if I’m going to have the ONE.

On the upside, I’ve been trying to get a certain job with the county for five years and I finally got called for it last week. They are allowing me to start and do the training, then I can take a Leave of Absence until I have the baby and am able to go back to work – which is actually a Godsend. The only problem is that I’m going to have to have the amnio before I take my Leave and don’t want to take any time from the new job in order to do this. So, I have a real Catch-22 situation going on here.

Other than all of this, I feel good. I’ve had no real bleeding or cramps since the cerclage and I go back a week from today to have that checked out. In the meantime, I have to try to find someone who can do this amnio that my OB will trust. Or see if I can just wait and have the amnio after I go on bedrest….

And that’s my update for now…..promise I will be more regular about my posts from here on in.

Better day today… January 18, 2009

Dan’s parents called last night and they are going to pay our mortgage while I’m on bedrest! Yayyy…Wheewwww…Thank you God…and whatever other words of praise I can come up with!!!
This is truly a blessing – thank goodness they are in the position to help us like this.
That, combined with the meager disability I will get and Dan’s pay will keep us on track with our bills. So, I can now look at the bedrest idea with a clear mind and not have to worry too much about finances…just my job!

Got some daunting news this week… January 17, 2009

We went to the HighRisk Perinatalogist this week to talk about the cerclage.

After a ridiculous wait of 2 hours we finally were taken into the sono room for the sonogram of MackBaby, then the Dr. was going to come in and speak with us. Another 20 minute wait and the sono tech came in to do the sonogram. Baby looks great!!! Pics at the bottom…all 3D. Apparently they only really give you 3D pics. Sort of made the wait worth it….especially when I could see the little creature moving around. Then the tech left and said the Dr. would be in shortly.

Twenty minutes later – she arrived. She went over what happened to me with Rogan, asked some questions and then told me about the cerclage procedure. She explained that I would NOT have to take a week off from work after the cerclage….I do however, have to go on bedrest from 20 weeks to 35 weeks…. 

This is the most frightening thought…how will we survive? pay the mortgage? pay our other bills?

But what choice do I have? This baby is going to be okay…and I will do whatever I have to in order to insure that. So bedrest it is….

I’m not sure if I’m going to have a job after all this is over, but I don’t really have any other options. I spoke to my boss on Friday and I think he was as shocked as me….I’m sure he doesn’t know what he’s going to do either…four months without me – he’s going to have to hire someone else. It’s not like I’m irreplacable either…my  job is not that difficult. Plus, my co-worker of 20 years is not happy at all about it. I’m sure he feels like he’s being thrown to the wolves…. All I can really do is hope it all works out.

So, Dan and I are trying to figure out what we can do and how we will live – hoping that it all works. And that’s the best we can do right now. So far, the creature looks great and that’s the most important thing of all. Everything else will be what it will be…..

 

And without further ado…some 3D sono pics of our 10 week old peanut!!!!

Suddenly – I suck at this! January 9, 2009

I thought I would be posting here incessantly…but sleep has taken over my life. It’s all I want to do. There was a time (not so long ago) when I could go without sleep for days, now I’d like to sleep for days.

But, nothing new really going on so that may be another reason why I’m not around so much. It’s much easier to report each day when there are follies growing, being retrieved, etc, etc. Now, it’s just the day to day life of work, sleep and eat…in pretty much that order.

I did go to the OB Wednesday and he consulted with the high-risk OB that I will also be seeing. It has been determined that my cerclage will be put off until after the ultrasound…just to make sure the baby has no serious issues.  Which I am sure it won’t…I come from healthy stock and this baby is going to be just fine. Rogan was fine and there is no reason why this little creature should be any different. So, I go to the High-Risk on Thursday for my first tri sonogram…it’s the first time I’ll see the baby since it was a bean – literally. This is such a different pregnancy from Rogan – then my RE was doing sono’s every week…now I just had one and I go for bloodwork each week, no sono. I guess he figures all is well since there was no sign of early miscarriage last time.

My sister had her first real sono yesterday and saw the fetus move a little. It is starting to grow little leg stumps…very funny looking. She is over the moon now about this baby…where before she was complaining about gaining weight, now she’s just happy. Thank God for that….appreciate what you have is what I say.

And now, I have to go take a shower and get on with the workday!! Yuck!

Happy New Year!!! January 3, 2009

Not a whole lot of new to report….same old, same old – except with a lot of nausea added.

Not really complaining…besides, I’m not actually throwing up – just constantly nauseous and no matter what I do it doesn’t go away. I tried eating constantly and although my weight went up, the m/s didn’t go away. So now, I’m just dealing with it.  In a way  I kind of like it cuz I know I’m still PG….the cramps just frighten  me, so the nausea is a good thing.

NYE was very uneventful. Hubby worked, so I went to my brother’s with my Mom and sis. It was an extremely nice relaxing New Years….then I went and crashed at my Mom’s cuz I couldn’t deal with the 40 minute drive.

Yesterday, I left work and went to visit my Mother and crashed again….I’m starting to think the drive home scares me so much I have to sleep before I get in the car. Although, thankfully last night I just slept for two hours and then went home.

The visiting of my mother may have to stop….

It’s been a real long while…. December 31, 2008

Sorry I haven’t been around. It’s been very hectic with California, Christmas, etc. I’m not sure I can even squeeze it all into one post.
My third beta was 16,000 so I was scheduled for a sono this past Monday – more on that later.
My sister had her first sono on the Monday before Christmas and was given a due date of August 15. I figured I’d be around the 20th then. She saw the heartbeat and everything looks great.
Christmas was great this year. My mom was actually feeling okay, we had a nice Christmas Eve albeit there was a little drama. When isn’t there drama when you have a group of 12 siblings and SO’s. Christmas Day was hosted by yours truly and went off without a hitch. Misty was crated while everyone was here due to allergies, but that actually worked out for the better and I may do that from now on. My Crown Roast of Pork came out late but it was delish.
And of course I got everything I wanted….mostly the pregnancy, I would have been happy with just that.
And we had our first sono on Monday. BabyMack is measuring in at approx. 13 mm and is dated at 7weeks4days so my due date is August 12/13. We saw the heartbeat which totally made me cry…I think I was going to hug Dr. K, but I had no pants on so it made it kind of difficult. DH was sooooooooooo excited.
Now of course it’s back to worrying. I made my appointment with the regular OB and am seeing him on 1/7, which is when I’ll find out about the cerclage.
Thank you so much for following along with me….I still can’t believe we got a second chance at this. I really didn’t think it was going to happen. Now all I can do is pray for a smooth pregnancy….

Things are continuing to look pretty good December 14, 2008

Beta was at 3800 on Saturday which is a good number, means things are progressing nicely. I have to go back this coming Friday (the 19th) for another beta and then on the 29th I go for a sono to see if the embie/baby has a heartbeat. That will be the biggie.

California was really nice. We spent most of our time with family, but we did get some driving time on the PCH in. It’s very pretty out there…but also wayyy too expensive for my taste. I’m a poor person…and I’m not sure I’d even want to be that wealthy. But it was great seeing family – we haven’t seen them since the summer.  BTW, for all the people who think the Santa Monica Pier is something they have to see – don’t waste your time. It’s an arcade and fair – no more, no less. If you go to the pier, go to see the seals, cormorants and grebes(light colored cormorant looking birds).  And the scenery…

Had a Christmas party at my house with all my local “Infertility Friends” and we had a great time. I had a house full of kids ranging in age from 6 months to 5 years and it was so much fun. Although, after 7 hours I guess Misty had had enough and she nipped at the 5 year old. I’m not happy about it, but his mother was great and totally understood that the dog was tired and just reacted to him running by. I was really upset cuz she had been really good with the kids all day….I never expected that at the end of the night. She didn’t even break skin, but it was enough to disturb me.

In other news, my sister just announced that she is pregnant. If all goes well, we will be due within two weeks of each other. I can honestly say that at first I was a little angry and/or jealous, but I seem to have gotten past it and am thinking how great it will be that these cousins will be so close in age and get to grow up together. I remember how much fun I used to have with the cousins who were around my age and I really think this is going to be a good thing.

And that’s all I got…..I now have to go back to working on my Christmas Dinner menu. We have 13 people coming over and I’m thinking of doing a crown roast of pork for dinner.

Oh and some pics from Santa Monica!

Dan and Jack at the Dinosaur!

Dan and I

A view of the Pacific Coast Highway

Beta and other thangs… December 10, 2008

Haven’t been around in a bit cuz I’ve been super busy. We left for California on Monday and the Dr. called just as we were boarding the plane. My beta was 676…which makes me extremely happy…but I’ve been second guessing everything ever since. If I don’t feel nauseau I think it’s a problem, if I feel any cramping I think it’s a problem. What if the embie is not developing, etc. etc. 

I’m trying to enjoy myself here, but am very nervous. We are visiting family so it’s not like an action packed vacation, but I still worry. I go back for the second beta on Saturday when we get home, so I hope that number makes me feel better.

Anyway, kids are looking for me so it’s off to play more games with the niece and nephew.