6 embies – 1 -12 cell, 1- 10 cell, 2- 8 cell and 2 – 7 cell…will any of them be any good is the real question?

And there are 35 left as 6 didn’t make it to freeze…

And all I can do is wait and try not to think about it. Transfer itself went very well, which for me is sort of a bonus. Usually, I can feel it when the catheter goes through the cervix – not so today. I was shocked when I heard Dr. K tell the embryologist to load…so hopefully that will be a good thing. I can only wait two weeks and find out then.

As I said to Dr. K while being wheeled out – this part is easy, it’s the next two weeks that suck…

Oh, and my dog has learned to find rotten jalapenos in the garden, eat them and then throw them up in the house or the car…good times. Which means I went out to clean out the garden bed and hope that she doesn’t dig anymore up.

…and I already have 30 follicles at or around 11mm.

Did I mention that I’m a freak?! Of course, of those follies I’ll be lucky if one is decent. I did the 150iu of Gonal F up until this morning…now I’m doing 1 vial of Cetritide and 8 units of Micro-dose Ovidrel. All with daily monitoring. I have to give the Dr. credit, they are definitely monitoring me closely.

Oh and Estradial is 1270, FSH is 11.8 and Progesterone was 1.8…..

I just want one good egg. One egg that will genetically be able to create a healthy child. One egg that I can count on. Out of all these stupid eggs, I just want one. I don’t even care how long it takes me to get to that egg….I just want it to be there.

Everyone thinks it’s sooooooooo wonderful that I create all these eggs. Everyone thinks that I’ll definitely get PG with all these eggs. What “Everyone” doesn’t understand is that after going through 60 – yes 60!!! – embryo’s, I had one good pregnancy. One healthy baby, who I lost because of my cervix. Now, I have to hope that of these that I get now…..there is one more baby. What are the real odds of that? Probably not that great. But, I keep hoping. And I keep praying. Cuz if that baby isn’t in this bunch of eggs…then it’s no baby for us.

And that’s my rant for the day.