It's unusual…

..what started out as an IVF journey and ended up being about life

Day 8…. October 24, 2008

Filed under: IVF — gertyrae @ 11:44 pm
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…and there’s lots of follies there. We have 40 some-odd counted at or over 11mm with the largest being 15mm. I’ve been taking Cetritide and Microdose Ovidrel for the last few days to sort of keep things growing at the same rate.

Had a nice little chat with the PA who did my sono this morning. They have been asking me how I feel EVERY day for the last three or four day and my reply is ALWAYS “I feel fine.”. So today, the lovely O asks me the question as she’s measuring little circles on a screen and I give her my usual reply. She comes back with (and I’ve paraphrased here)- “I wish I could record your responses so the chronic complainers could understand the difference.” She made me feel really good about the fact that I don’t piss and moan over every cramp and pull. Although, I did forget about the lovely blackandblues that appear on the belly after doing injections for a week.

And as far as how I feel, I really do feel fine. I’ve been walking the hound every day and we took in our friends lab for the weekend (I will get pics of these two in action up on the board), so I’m sure I’ll be doing more walking in the next few days. I have a slight “heavy” feeling in my pelvic area, but that’s about it. I am gaining a little weight, but I’m not sure if it’s fluids or my eating habits.

Have to go back tomorrow a.m. for more blood and sono…my arms are starting to look really interesting after blood six days in a row. I’m thinking two or three more days of stims and then it’s retrieval time.

On another note…got some apples the other day from Jericho Cider Mills (live happily appily!) and if the weather tomorrow afternoon is as predicted – I think I’ll be making some apple crisp! and I have some leftover marshmallows so it might be junk food night with Rice Crispy treats to go with the Apple Crisp.


Day 5 of stims… October 22, 2008

Filed under: IVF — gertyrae @ 7:40 pm
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…and I already have 30 follicles at or around 11mm.

Did I mention that I’m a freak?! Of course, of those follies I’ll be lucky if one is decent. I did the 150iu of Gonal F up until this morning…now I’m doing 1 vial of Cetritide and 8 units of Micro-dose Ovidrel. All with daily monitoring. I have to give the Dr. credit, they are definitely monitoring me closely.


Oh and Estradial is 1270, FSH is 11.8 and Progesterone was 1.8…..

I just want one good egg. One egg that will genetically be able to create a healthy child. One egg that I can count on. Out of all these stupid eggs, I just want one. I don’t even care how long it takes me to get to that egg….I just want it to be there.

Everyone thinks it’s sooooooooo wonderful that I create all these eggs. Everyone thinks that I’ll definitely get PG with all these eggs. What “Everyone” doesn’t understand is that after going through 60 – yes 60!!! – embryo’s, I had one good pregnancy. One healthy baby, who I lost because of my cervix. Now, I have to hope that of these that I get now…..there is one more baby. What are the real odds of that? Probably not that great. But, I keep hoping. And I keep praying. Cuz if that baby isn’t in this bunch of eggs…then it’s no baby for us.

And that’s my rant for the day.


Ay Caramba!!

Filed under: IVF — gertyrae @ 6:32 am
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Well, after four days (actually 3.5) of stims, I went in yesterday to check progress.

I already have follies. 4 between 8 and 10mm on the right and 6 between 8 and 10mm on the left. With many smaller….I go back this morning to check again. I’m sure they are already worried….

As my Physicians Assistant said -“There will be plenty of eggs.” I just wish they could guarantee a good one. I hate going through this process and not knowing if there is going to be one decent egg that can give us our miracle baby.

My poor hubby is all emotional right now. I know how badly he wants this to work, but he doesn’t really say anything cuz he doesn’t want to make it harder for me. Meanwhile, he has to deal with guys he works with coming in and showing pics of their new babies. And now, one of his friends is taking my husbands idea of tattooing the baby’s footprints on his chest and putting his own son’s (of course, his son is okay) footprints on his arm. So, of course, my hubby is all upset about it. I don’t even know what to say to him sometimes. I’ve gotten past that stuff – everyone I know practically has had a baby in the last year – so it’s not as hard for me as it is him. Besides, I’m just a less emotional person in general.

Anyway….I’m off to shower and get ready for Dr. K – or one of his lovely assistants – to see what we have going on.




Someone explain how a 43 year old person can produce AAAALLLLLLL these eggs and not have one child to show for it?  Chew on that and get back to me. 🙂


It’s Official… October 18, 2008

Filed under: IVF — gertyrae @ 2:31 am
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I have started stims…2 75iu of Gonal F in the a.m. and p.m. – started tonight.

I am so nervous about this…I wish there was a way to know in advance what the outcome is going to be. And I don’t even mean about getting PG. I just wish there was a way to know if I was going to produce enough eggs to get a good one without hyperstimming.

But, it’s a leap of faith, right? and I’m ataking it.

So – I took a deep breath – especially after going to watch my friends daughter cheer at her first Friday Night High School Football Game and after hanging out with my friend, her 14 year old daughter, my 9 year old Godson and her 16 month old son…I realized that I do have to take this leap. If it works, I will be at a game sometime in the future with my own child. And it will all be worth it for that – and I came home and gave myself that injection.

So we are officially off and running.

I will be doing the 150iu of Gonal F morning and night until Tuesday, when I go in for blood and sono and we see where we are at.